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'If God Wore Socks' Funny Sobriety Card

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Signature Matte
18 pt thickness / 120 lb weight Soft white, soft eggshell texture
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Size: Standard, 5" x 7"

Thank you, hello, or I love you, custom greeting cards are thoughtful gifts that are always the perfect way to express yourself.

  • Dimensions: 5" x 7" (portrait); 7" x 5" (landscape)
  • Full colour CMYK print process
  • Double sided printing for no additional cost

Paper Type: Signature Matte

Our Signature Matte paper is a customer favorite—smooth to the touch with a soft eggshell texture that elevates any design. Its sturdy 18 pt weight and natural feel make it the ideal choice for timeless, sophisticated events.

  • Exclusively made for Zazzle
  • Made and Printed in the USA
  • FSC® Certified—sourced from responsibly managed forests that protect both people and planet

About This Design

'If God Wore Socks' Funny Sobriety Card

'If God Wore Socks' Funny Sobriety Card

Most meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous read aloud Chapter 5 – How it Works, which includes the 12 Steps and closes with three pertinent ideas: • That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives. • That probably no human power could have re¬lieved our alcoholism. • That God could and would if He were sought. Especially at meetings in the Los Angeles area where sober members tend to verbalize the last line of every reading aloud and in unison, occasional members of the non-sheep variety like to mess with the end and instead recite: “That God could and would if he wore socks.” A God of our understanding wears knee-high socks with colourful stripes. Your God might prefer to wear pantyhose. Who are we to judge? Card is blank inside so you can draw your own Higher Power. Or socks.

Customer Reviews

4.9 out of 5 stars rating17.6K Total Reviews
16563 total 5-star reviews726 total 4-star reviews121 total 3-star reviews61 total 2-star reviews117 total 1-star reviews
17,588 Reviews
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5 out of 5 stars rating
By Debra J.April 17, 2024Verified Purchase
Folded Greeting Card, Size: Standard, 5" x 7", Paper: Signature Matte, Envelopes: White
Really pleased with the card quality. The perfect theme to personalize a birthday celebration. Birthday greeting combined with a Christmas wish for my nieces Christmas Birthday. Perfect! These colours really pop on this Matte finish. The cute funny monkey expressions add humour to a birthday card surprise.
5 out of 5 stars rating
By AnonymousOctober 1, 2025Verified Purchase
Folded Greeting Card, Size: Big, 8.5" x 11", Paper: Signature Matte, Envelopes: White
I absolutely love this!! Thank you so much for creating a very special birthday card for my mom for her very special day!
5 out of 5 stars rating
By Stacey V.May 5, 2023Verified Purchase
Folded Greeting Card, Size: Small, 4" x 5.6", Paper: Signature Matte, Envelopes: White
Zazzle Reviewer Program
This card is beautiful. I loved that I could pick special poems that mean something to me and will mean so much to my friend who lost her pet soul mate. The picture and the poems I requested turned out Purrfect! I will definitely be back to place more orders with this seller. Thank you for the amazing work you do!!

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Folded Greeting Cards
sobrietyfunnyhumourrecoveryalcoholics anonymoustwelve stepssobercardgodsocks
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sobrietyfunnyhumourrecoveryalcoholics anonymoustwelve stepssobercardgodsocks

Other Info

Product ID: 137039957276682629
Designed on 2016-02-17, 10:40 PM
Rating: G