Sinuous squamous coolness for your phone. Here's her story: It can be immediately apparent that some men are going to be nothing but trouble, and if Lydia Esperanza were to be completely honest, she knew Jimmy Varanus was going to be one of them from the very start. But his dark hair was so glossy, his glittering black eyes so piercing, his voice so smooth it was almost a hiss – she found herself smitten despite her best judgment. Of course, Jimmy then wasted no time in slithering into every corner of her life, insinuating himself so firmly that dislodging him would be massively inconvenient if not downright destructive. Luckily, Lydia’s sister, Lena was not fooled for a moment and being unambiguously lesbian, was utterly immune to Jimmy’s dubious charms. She pressed a lavender powder neatly folded into a packet of waxed paper into Lydia’s palm. “Just in case, hon. You never know. I tucked the instructions into your tobacco box,” Lena whispered. Lydia probably could have put up with the missing cash, drunken late nights and flagrant cheating, at least for a while, but when Jimmy’s words became viciously hurtful, she knew it was only a matter of time before she began accidentally walking into doors and falling down flights of stairs. She began collecting Jimmy’s cigarette butts, a few strands of his hair from the sink, a single dark eyelash from his sleeping cheek, and on a night so foggy it seemed a cloud had swallowed her house, she tapped a few drops of quinine and the mysterious powder (now green!) into Jimmy’s whiskey bottle and topped it off with some malt liquor. She pretended to be asleep as he drained most of it and instantly passed out cold. Mixing the items she collected into her pipe along with some tobacco, she lit the mixture and smoked slowly while she recited the words passed from sister to sister for generations for just such unfortunate situations. Lydia woke up with a jolt, a rude ray of sunlight smacking her right in the face and glanced over at the sofa. On a stack of oriental cushions, an enormous black monitor lizard blinked its black glittering eyes at her. “Jimmy?” she whispered and the squamate critter flicked its forked tongue at her a few times. “Well I guess that’s that!” Lydia said, emptying the bottle of whisky down the drain. It turns out that Jimmy made a much better pet than he did a lover. He was quite affectionate, as giant lizards go, as well as protective – it takes a reptile to know one and he could sense a cad before he hit the front stoop. This original artwork and story are copyright Ramona Szczerba 2010. Copyright to this material is in no way transferable with the sale of this item. The buyer is not entitled to any reproduction rights – neither image nor story can be reproduced without my express written permission. Thanks!